Words, only a few
But I latch onto them
And immediately…
Stack them on my shoulders
On top of what’s already there
The tense knots and taut muscles
On the verge of snapping
Or completely seizing up
Built over the years
Addressed occasionally
But no permanent solution found
To avoid adding to
To take concerns and worries
And deal with them right there
To process what I can do
And let the Universe have the rest
Along with a trust and faith
That I’m not abdicating my responsibility
But that’s what it wants me to do
Because it is always there for me
Along with all of my ethereal support system
But I’ve been thoroughly convinced
That there is no magic or white knight
To come and fix anything for me
I need to do this myself
And if I’m not doing or creating
Then I’m being lazy
Procrastinating and avoiding what I have to do
And while this fight goes on in my head
My smile falls further to the ground
Because now…
Other than the problem that I’ve piled on
I’ve added the conflict
Of whether I understand this life
Know what it is that I’m supposed to do
And surrendering to a defeat
That I have no idea how to deal with trouble
And I’m just storing it
Keeping the ills to fester and rot
To cause pain at a later date
When I decide that I should be figuring it out
Offloading all these concerns that I’ve collected
And trying to learn how to do all of this
Debbie Gravett © 2022.06.11
Image by Daniel Kirsch from Pixabay
Debbie Gravett 