How are you feeling? What is your colour this week? Mine has been a little blue.
What have you been up to lately? I have been trying to get my writing mojo back, which is a constant struggle when you’re fighting with yourself. I seem to be able to write poetry without these issues, perhaps because they are my feelings dumped onto the page, but when it comes to my stories I always land up stopping myself either before I begin or a little way in because of my low self-worth. I’ve always put other people before myself and bend over backwards to fulfil their needs but view my wishes as less important and thus myself.
Now I’m doing a deep dive into myself and my inner beliefs to reprogram this nonsense so that I can have faith in my ability to string words together and that someone out there would want to read them and possibly enjoy them.
I hope those participating in NanoWriMo (not me this year) are not having any such difficulties and are spewing the words onto the page at a rate of knots. December is for editing or January. Good luck and carry on writing.
Loving me some rainy weather and the brown lawn of winter turning a lovely summer green. Not enjoying the thunder and lightening so much, but that’s how we do storms here in Johannesburg, South Africa.
- Got some exercise in.
- Submitted a short story to Furious Fiction competition.
- Write a book. I’m leaving this here for the rest of the year or until I’ve done it. And to figure out what is stopping me and work through it.
- Write a poem for a poetry competition due the end of November.
Cracked desert plain of wind-blown dust
Inner landscape of the crumpled destruction
Of the drought of value and self-worth
No nutrients to feed the needing soul
To achieve all that it is meant to be
As the eclipse of self-doubt and fear
Hide the light required for growth
To precipitate a lush garden of success
In the comfort of knowing and accepting
The beautiful magnificence of oneself
A secret hidden from the corrupting mind
Loathe to ever put yourself first
In false belief of servitude and respect
After-thought citizen shrivelling interior
Grasping with blunt bleeding withered digits
To hold on to a better purpose for living
Than for the life of others
You don’t have to do a particular thing to be deserving of being worthy of everything. You were born being worth it. Believe it!
Enjoy a week of believing you are worth your care, love and time – ALWAYS.